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Entries from September 2002

j’écris en francais pour plusieurs raisons

September 30th, 2002 · 1 Comment

surtout parce ce que je le trouve fort jolie, et, pour exprimer des sentiments les plus profonds, mieux que l’américain. aussi, pour que tout le monde ne puisse lire ce que j’écris, comme je me trouve au mielleux de la bibliothèque. translate this if you wish. j’ai noté des telles choses intéressants pendant la journée. […]

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irritation

September 30th, 2002 · 2 Comments

it is 12:28 am. i finally caved and am eating something because the hunger was preventing me from sleep. it isn’t like i don’t want to eat, i love food. rather, just nothing ever sounds good. and i have a hard time wanting to exert the effort to do anything except sit still. so cereal […]

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today’s progress: smiles

September 29th, 2002 · No Comments

every so often the cheery nature will poke through. if i’m not thinking about it. like today, at work, we got really busy. took my mind of the whole situation for a good hour or so. during which time i was actually semi-personable. i think my mom feels bad. she called once last night and […]

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daddy suggests maybe calling mother is a good idea.

September 29th, 2002 · 1 Comment

she’s here in town, she can come over and hold you for a little while if you need it. against my gut, i cave and promise to call. it was a bad idea. i knew there was a reason i hadn’t done that. she and two of my younger sisters came over. what i needed: […]

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La joie venait toujours après la peine.

September 28th, 2002 · No Comments

Le Pont Mirabeau Sous le pont Mirabeau coule la Seine Et nos amours Faut-il qu’il m’en souvienne La joie venait toujours après la peine Vienne la nuit sonne l’heure Les jours s’en vont je demeure Les mains dans les mains restons face à face Tandis que sous Le pont de nos bras passe Des éternels […]

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Protected: drinking is the answer.

September 28th, 2002 · Enter your password to view comments.

There is no excerpt because this is a protected post.

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more posting. coping as i go. sorry.

September 28th, 2002 · 1 Comment

the one time i want to be alone, there’s a goddamn fall festival going on at school. and then i remembered. sometimes the easiest way to be alone is wrapped in a crowd. i am at the library, attempting to a)not look to see if he is at his usual spot b)study for fucking test […]

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journal as a lifeline.

September 28th, 2002 · 2 Comments

They let me go early from work. I wasn’t much good for anything anyways. Still hurting. Wallowing. I wish I wasn’t awake. With all my heart I wish it. All the heart I have left, anyways. You’d be surprised how much you can cry. -bradly going to bed. breathing. trying not to touch that tender […]

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a love letter.

September 28th, 2002 · No Comments

i ran across a love letter i’d written him. half finished because i didn’t think it did justice. i had four different friends come to my rescue last night. only one could be here. but they all cared. and he didn’t. that hurt too. i think i am going to be sick. ~h

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630

September 28th, 2002 · 1 Comment

i think i’m going to throw up. why do i have to be awake? i spend all night from 830 to 1230 sobbing and talking about it. and then i dream about him. and then i wake up at 630 in the morning and i can’t go back to sleep. because the first thing on […]

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